What is the Sphinx....and who am I?: CONCLUSION
Part 4: A Naming Poem (composed sometime in 2009)
While cleaning out a closet on the same day I found words, I found a box full of old journals and my old words. It was interesting yet difficult to read some of them. I had journaled during the early days of my separation, throughout my first trip to Egypt in 2016, my solo trip to NYC in 2015. There were notes from early writing workshops, notes for workshops I wanted to teach, writing essays from prompts or just from my Self. Reading through it all, I wondered, "Did any of it matter? Was anyone else going to read them and appreciate them?” IDK, but I found a few gems that I'll add to my little book of writings and this writing exercise called “A Naming Poem”.
“I am Amy, daughter of Marvin of Ohio and Deborah of Indiana; child of Marvin, who filed and typed and counseled people about money by day, who played with his children, taught them about animals and gardening, and worked with wood by night. Child of Deborah, who cooked with love, cleaned the homes of others as well as her own, taught her children how to love and care for others as well as themselves.
I am Amy, she who decorated her room with horses, who climbed trees, waded in creeks, and fed the cows. I am she who plays music with her fingers upon strings of ivory in the sanctuary. I am Amy, a woman of adventure and traveling. I flew alone across the pond to meet strangers who became friends. I am she who fell in love at first sight and envisioned a family. I am Amy who sees the world with new eyes each day and listens to the secrets in the wind.
“I am Amy who loved Eric, the strong lion who stands beside me to keep me company, who walks in front of me when I get lost, who follows behind me so that I may experience freedom. I am she who loved Doris, mother of Deborah, who spoiled me while she was in this world and who spoils me from the netherworld. I am she who loves Zach, child of Eric, for his easy-going free spirit. I am Amy who loved Elysia, who has blossomed and grown more beautiful and more amazing with each passing season. I am she who has loved Shelby, who grows slower than she would like and whose spirit is wild and free.
I am Amy who loves the warmth of her beloved's embrace, the sound of the rain coming across the fields like a promise of redemption, the smell of freshly-tilled soil and the sweat of the horse in harness; I love the sight of home after a long day away. I have been to the rural lands, soft and simple. I have been to the cities, dense and filled with people.
I have chanted the name of Ra and Isis in rituals. I have spoken the words of beings of light in circles. I have heeded the call of the goddess and my heart swells with love, joy, and is filled to overflowing with gratitude.
Remember that I am Amy, she who rode as one upon her horse. Remember that I am Amy, who ran barefoot through the yard and across the rocky road.
All hail to you, Great Divine, who lives and breathes within the rise and fall of the ocean tides. I have seen your presence in the majesty of the mountains and I have felt your healing hands upon my body.
Bless me, great and glorious isis, Goddess of All That Is. I am Amy and I feel loved and surrounded by your wings. I am lifted to the heavens and we are one.”
Today I finally found some words. I didn’t know this would be so stressful to write everything and get it into words but I know I have more healing to do because my body is in a cold sweat. There is more to come but this is a good place to start within time and space.
Thank you for reading and for holding this space for me.
Written 7/17/25